The Key to Successful Youth Ministry: PARENTS!

April, 2009
by Joe Ollier
Director of Youth Ministry, Ascension Parish in Kettering, Ohio

If you’re like most folks in Youth Ministry, your real passion is working with teenagers, and that’s where you focus your time and energy. After all, we do what we do because we love kids, right? But if there’s one thing the NSYR (National Study of Youth & Religion) reveals, it’s that the ministry we do with parents is the real key to the success of our ministry with young people. In fact, the best way we can impact teenagers is my impacting their families. So how do we do that? Remember these four “Be’s”:

Be parental. Try to see your program from your parents’ viewpoint. Is your ministry respectful of family dynamics and schedules? Would you want your own teenager involved?

Be present. Hang out where you’ll engage both parents and teenagers. Make the rounds at parish events like the festival, spaghetti dinner, Donut Sunday, and in the gathering space at church between masses. Go to high school sporting events. If you have a family, join a swimming pool this summer. Get to know parents by name.

Be practical. Offer opportunities to help families see their everyday lives through a Catholic lens. National CYO Sports (www.nationalcyosports.org) has great resources to help your athletic boosters, parents, and athletes infuse sports with spirituality. And there are some great resources that focus on seeing financial issues like credit, debt, investing and tithing through God’s eyes. Combine those with advice form a financial expert from your parish, and you can impact the whole community.

Be proactive. You know how you avoid some people because you know that every time you talk to them you end up with more to do? Don’t be that person. Most parents are swamped with too much as it is, and it’s difficult to engage them if they suspect we’re just there because we want something from them. Don’t take it personally; just keep reaching out in friendship. Once they get the picture that you don’t want something from them but want to support them, it will be a different story. Think creatively about ways to help parents talk with their kids about faith; most don’t know how. Anticipate needs and mark key events in kids’ and families’ lives. Mail a prayer card to families of young drivers. Send a note to teenagers on the one-year anniversary of their Confirmation. Remember that meeting needs isn’t about adding new programs; it’s about encountering people in the everyday.

These next few months can be a great time to rest, re-charge, and do a little re-tooling for the program year ahead. Have fun!